Two Front Teeth

zombie girl

All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth. It’s so hard to rip flesh from a human without front teeth. All the other Zombie kids can eat their fill while I sit gumming a sliver or two from the corpse. I’m just getting started on the appetizer when all the choice cuts have been picked over.

I wrote a letter to Santa about my teeth, but now that I just shamble about the countryside and don’t have a chimney, he’ll probably never find me. He’s probably worried I might try the eat him or one of his reindeer. Oh well, here comes another unsuspecting human. Merry Christmas.

If you want to be scared for the holiday, try: Something in the Dark

The book includes:

SOMETHING IN THE LAKE
Two friends from the poor side of town come to fish at Manchester Cove, a luxury community of estates located on a beautiful lake during the off-season. They ignore the sign, “Absolutely No Fishing.”

SOMETHING IN THE CAR
After a deer crashes through the windshield of a car, the stranger who rescued the husband from the wreckage tells him his wife’s mutilated, bloodless corpse is not human.

SOMETHING IN THE MORGUE
A serial killer has driven a crucifix through the hearts of seven boys and extracted their incisors.

SOMETHING IN THE WOODS
After catching a brief glimpse, A hunter shoots and kills a strange hairy animal that wore glasses and was reading a book.

SOMETHING IN THE HOUSE
Randolph and Francene have come from the cemetery with some friends to visit a house where they lived when they were alive.

SOMETHING IN THE ATTIC
While searching for her Halloween costume in the attic, a teenager lapses into unconsciousness after reading from a book that belonged to a grandma burned at the stake during the Salem witch trials.

SOMETHING IN THE CLOSET
John returns to the house where the boogeyman tried to eat him when he was ten years old.

SOMETHING IN THE ICE
A teenager finds a monster frozen in the lake on the same day big cats have escaped from the local zoo and are gobbling up the town folk.

SOMETHING IN THE DARK
A woman plagued by recurring nightmares that have plagued her since she was a little girl seeks help from the most expensive shrink in NYC to effectively save her life.

SOMETHING IN THE CAVE
Mysterious things begin to happen when two friends explore a cave over a thousand feet deep and find a myriad of tunnels someone created long ago.

SOMETHING IN THE BASEMENT:
Something big in the basement has devoured Mike’s neighbor’s cat on loan to catch a mouse.

SOMETHING IN THE SWAMP
Mandy is the only one who can see her imaginary friend who lives in the swamp.

SOMETHING IN THE SNOW
An elderly man loses his faith in a snowstorm on the last day of his life.

SOMETHING IN THE TOMB
The museum director has offered Brian one last chance to keep the job he has held only because of his father’s legendary accomplishments. His must find the last undiscovered Egyptian Pharaoh’s tomb, despite ancient beliefs that breaking the seal will bring death to all mankind.

Remember, Don’t Look Behind You.
http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JQOR57C

Don’t miss the gruesome book trailer:

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