Not Human And She Has An Ax

not human

She’s not human and she has an ax. She looks hungry. She doesn’t look or sound like she would make a good bridge partner since she only¬† makes unintelligible grunts and groans.

The next scream you hear, may be your own if you try to touch her, you know…get her in the sack. She only wants to eat you, not have sex with you. She’s pigeon-toed but she shambles pretty fast. They also say in her prime she could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch and afterward suck a golf ball through forty feet of garden hose, whatever that means.

She rarely eats animals. She’s always been a people person.

If you’d like some horror stories to read for Halloween, enjoy one of my horror collections by clicking the cover:

Sample one of my FREE sample stories:


I have written 171 short stories so far in my quest to exceed Ray Bradbury's 400 short stories. It goes without saying it will be an uphill climb. My web site,, includes sample stories from all ten horror story collections. Since reviews are the life's blood of every author, I would greatly appreciate a review of any of my books on and hold anyone who does in high esteem for all eternity. Stephen King is my favorite horror writer, and I admire what King has accomplished in the horror genre in terms of movies made from his considerable volume of work. My Coffeesmoke channel on You Tube has amassed over 2,600,000 hits, mostly from my "Dead Celebrities" videos. I love movies and had seen over 1,500 by the age of 13 when there was snow on 13 channels after midnight. My favorite horror movies are Halloween, Night of the Living Dead, and the Evil Dead. My favorite movie of all time Is Frank Capra's It's A Wonderful Life with James Stewart. My favorite authors are Stephen King, Ray Bradbury, Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child, John Sandford, Michael Connelly, Robert B. Parker , Clive Cussler, James Patterson, Jeffery Deaver, Dean Koontz, Edgar Allen Poe, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, James Lee Burke, Richard Matheson, Lee Child, Jack Ketchum& Jack Kilborn/Konrath.
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