Wow! Nothing gives me hunger tantrums like the sight of a gleaming, rare bald pate shining in the hot sun. I start to salivate right away when an unsuspecting human comes within eating distance. I can deal with male pattern baldness in a pinch. Picking the hair from my teeth when I’m munching on the ears is annoying, but what’s a hungry zombie to do. There’s so much competition during the apocalypse, and rare bald pates are less common than a full crop of ugly hair.
Gee, how I would have loved to sink my teeth into Yul Brynner’s scalp, but I wasn’t even born when he roamed the earth. Maybe Bruce Willis will come along if he plays a part calling for no hair. I am infatuated by movie stars, but I never see one in this shitty neighborhood. Curses!
Meanwhile, if you like horror:
You can enjoy more cheap thrills whenever you like by buying one of my horror collections by clicking the cover: